"Where does Pakistan keep finding these amazing fast bowlers from? Probably the same place they find great musicians from"
- Ancient Chinese Proverb
Somewhere beneath the madness of the world cup, one of pakistan's most significant cultural moments was gleefully occurring. I am referring to what is currently the second most important TV show in Pakistan - uth records.
Now i realise that some of you might have missed it (catch all of the first season here) And I also know that many of you are still trying to adjust your mind's bleary eyes from the crushing hangover of the world cup. so, in an extravagant display of my magnanimity and confused mindset, i am going to put indulge in some intellectual crossing of these two perennial nashay - music and cricket.
presenting - UthRecords Songs As Pakistani Fast Bowlers.
(please note that the analogies are for the songs, not the artists. thanks.)
Jumbo Jatt - Jahiliya
In the recent past, Sheikhupura has beget two fast men to make it into the national side. A few years ago, during a vist there, i met three men whose primary pursuits involved getting drunk and betting on cricket. they had been avid followers of the domestic circuit for reasons of both passion and money, and they were extremely confused by something. of the two bowlers i speak of, one had been a waif like no-hope who had nothing special about him. a waste of space, they condemned him. the other, had it all.
and yet, mohammad asif was making mark nicholson cream his pants, while rana naved-ul-hasan was getting the thanks-for-coming notes.
it makes sense. rana's seam when he releases the ball is truer than a biblical prophet. he bowls at real pace, yet his slower deliveries are as deceptive as an akmal brother. he ticks every check box a premier fast bowler needs to. and yet.
something isn't there - the sum is not greater, even lesser than the parts.
that's the feeling i get with this song. i can't quite see what's wrong with it. the lyrics are contemporary, the sound is great, the length is just right, and faraz anwar provides some fascinating virtuousity right at the end. and yet.
perhaps it just sounds too much like a lot of other things.
the vocalist is good, but not distinctive. the guitars are awesome, but in an adequate way, if that makes any sense. perhaps the song suffers from hitting the right areas too much, and not providing a moment that surprises you.
don't get me wrong - its not in any way a bad song. it's rather tasty, but in a aalo-gobi kind of way, where you know its filled your stomach, but you're not going to spend the next day dreaming about it.
Jahiliya - Rana Naved
Usman Riaz - Hum Tum
If you ever talk to any Pakistani fan about fast bowling, particularly those from the 90s, they'll tell you a legend. a legend of a bowler so fast, he made shoaib look pedestrian. a bowler so demonic that lara himself bowed to his greatness. the bowler in question was mohammad zahid, and we'll forever associate him with the refrain - what if? what if his action hadn't caused his spine to shatter, curtailing his career? what if we had speed guns then to measure him, or what if we hadn't spent all our energies taking care of the other express man of that time - shoaib akhtar? what if?
and "what if" is the question that keeps coming back to you in this song.
let's face it - Usman Riaz is a talent of a phenomenal level. its kind of apt that he is such a fragile looking person, because that's the feeling you get from listening to him - someone so precocious and odiously talented feels too good to be true, you fear that this ugly world will devour him.
and perhaps recognizing that, Gumby and Omran were extremely careful with his song. they got the help of the supremely creative Sir Ahmed, they drafted in one of Pakistani pop's best vocalists. they did everything possible to make this work.
but when you listen to the song, you wonder - what if the vocals didn't come in to drown out the gorgeous guitar and piano solos? what if they had gone with a different feel, which wasn't so eager to be catchy? what if usman had just been left to his own devices? what if the collaborator was someone unassuming and unknown, instead of a colossal ego with a beard?
i honestly wanted to refrain from being bitchy in this review, but ali noor's attitude kinda pissed me off. with the utmost respect, the man deserves his ego. but like those tales of senior cricketers snubbing the youngersters in the team they feared would take their places, ali noor doesn't really go out to embrace the wunderkid, instead admonisihing him that the only way to do the song would be his way.
the silver lining of course is that the show has put usman riaz on the map. we all know him now, and perhaps a lot of us would be hungering for something more sublime from him. perhaps we will be more willing to treat him and accept him for the virtuouso he obviously is, and we will make peace that he won't give us catchy songs. i sure as hell hope so, because i don't want to be asking 'what if' with this guy any longer.
Hum Tum - Mohammad Zahid
"Sometimes in the heart, yes I do wish that I have the same kind of fans that Afridi and Shoaib have, the same fan following. But even then, I am satisfied with the following I have but I am never satisfied with my performance."
Umar Gul is quite an enigma for a Pakistani fast bowler. he has no airs, no tantrums, no controversies. he's a guy who went from here,
to here,
and he still comes across as the most honest, down to earth, sincere person to ever play for our ever-mercurial, self-destructive, attention-whore of a team.
in fact, in many ways he's like an anonymous fast bowler from another country - a bresnan, or an elworthy or a bichel. men who bowl honestly, who always try hard, who hit the right spots, and who you can always depend on. but what makes gul stand out is the fact that he has those amazing yorkers. you might go for a whole spell and spend half of it without seeing anything approaching brilliance, but when he comes good, he reminds you why exactly he deserves many more accolades than he ever gets. he reminds you why he's no forgotten fast men, but rather a proud addition to pakistan's pantheon of pacers.
this song is exactly like that. when you hear it for the first time, or perhaps when you are in a hurry, it sounds like a great song from an indian movie or pop album (which isn't saying much) yet, if you delve a little deeper, its beauty starts to come through. you realise that athar isn't just a good singer, he's a damn good one. you start hearing those subtle strums on the guitar, you feel the synth slowly enveloping you. you realise that the lyrics aren't as obvious as the chorus might have made you think. and you start realising that this song is something special. it won't get the headlines, and it won't make it into the greatest ever lists. yet it will be more than something dependable, something that would require patience. like gul, this song doesn't contract genital warts or smoke pot to get attention. it remains true to itself, and that's a quality that will endear this song to you quite unlike anything else.
Jaane Kyun - Umar Gul
I have to admit, i don't have a good analogy for this one. allow me to explain why. the first reaction i get when i listen to this song is how gorgeously smooth it is. there isn't quite another word that explains it as well - this song is like silk-made sharks in an ocean of cream. although i suppose if i am delving into culinary analogies, i should choose something which also reflects how light this song feels. not in a way that is vaccuous, but rather its lightness comes from a sort of whimsical joy it exhibits.
keeping that in mind, the best bowler-fit would be michael holding. if you haven't seen holding in action, click here and understand why umpires would claim they couldn't hear him approach when he bowled because his action was so rythimical it was virtually silent.
but holding's a jamaican. wasim bhai's action was beautifully efficient, but his action was not really the definig feature about him, so that's another analogy that tanks. the closest one that comes to mind is aqib javed.
aqib was a lot better bowler than history allows us to remember, mainly because he was drowned out by the two Ws. but aqib was also all about grace and guile, his approach was simple and yet it masked a ferocity.
in the same way, this song is deceptively simple because it masks an immediate ferocity of talent beneath. along with usman, natasha ejaz stood out as someone voraciously talented in this show. and its quite amazing that she didn't choose to have all of that in display in one go. instead, we got a song which is understated, yet of the kind which justifies why music players have the Repeat One option.
the real beauty of this song is natasha's voice, but you also have to acknowledge the 'techno-hip-hop' bits the producers provided. they complement the song beautifully, and never overstep the mark. trust me on this, you might not immediately shout and scream about this, but this song is something special.
Right Way to Fall - Aqib Javed
RamLal - Naughty Boy
Its almost too easy to find a Pakistani fast bowler who is analogous with a song called Naughty Boy, but let's not rush ourselves.
The bowler in question needs to be a druggie, a rogue, a subversive fellow who hits it with the ladies but isn't quite sure why. A guy who doesn't obviously come across as a problem, yet he is. more importantly, he needs to be a bowler who appears unassuming, and yet has the ability to make you start jumping with joy. someone who has the skills to seduce you without really looking like it.
step forward, Mohammad Asif.
the defining feature (rather memory) of asif's bowling was how the ball would wobble like a nautch-girl delivering thumkas in an item number. you could never tell from the seam which way an asif delivery would go, but it would perform all sorts of sorcery. in another culture, asif would have been a mcgrath - hugely succesful yet no more than a bland metronome. but because asif was pakistani, his bowling would have the same staid pace, but the wickedness of a saasu maa missing her tajori ki chabiyan.
that's what naughty boy is all about. its not in-your-face-rock. instead it has this jazzy, big band kind of feel, which like asif amongst the speedsters, is wonderfully refreshing. the guitars in this song are also delectable, changing tone and rythm deceptively yet decisevely. and the killer, that asif-esque moment of sublime brilliance, is the trumpet, which suddenly takes this song beyond decades and genres. but perhaps you were too busy laughing/being aghast at the subversive nature of the lyrics. its rare for such an honest and casual approach to 'dating' and 'mazay' being seen in the open in pakistan, but naughty boy does it in a way no one else has managed. Naughty Boy is a song that ambles up to the crease and doesn't exert too much effort, and yet its detached coolness kinda blows you away.
Naughty Boy - Mohammad Asif
Yasir & Jawad - Riedi Gul
My first memory of Mohammad Amir was at the World T20 final. till that moment, i'd known he'd existed because i'd seen him in the previous matches. and i knew that pakpassion had been hyping him up like crazy. but then again, they do that with everyone. i hadn't seen anything extraordinary till then. five deliveries changed my mind forever.
let's get the context in here. this was a world cup final. at fucking lord's, which has more history and tradition than the Jews. and at the crease was the small matter of the man of the tournament, the guy they'd just named a new stroke after. and the bowler was an unknown teenager.
this was a moment so huge physicists had to be called in to measure it.
and what did amir do - he siezed it.
no, he didn't just sieze it, he came up with the most surreal spell of momentum shattering bowling i had ever seen on such a huge stage since those two balls at the MCG. and from that moment, you knew that amir belonged. he was young, and raw, and there was a way to go, but he belonged and what's more, he was a superstar. no question.
i think you get my point here. this song, the moment you hear it, the moment the rubab comes in, the moment the beauty of the vocals hits you, the moment that the meethas of the song, the subtleties giving way to the soaring climax, the whole deal HITS you, you know these guys belong. you know these guys are superstars, not celebrities. its the sort of song, which even when you discount for my fetish for pashto vocals, makes you swell up your chest and feel good about living in a time and place where such beautiful music is made. it makes you feel good about yourself, even when all you've done is listen to it. it's that frickin' good.
now let's just hope that this song never meets anyone named mazhar.
Reidi Gul - Mohammad Amir.
Post-Script: Two shout outs remain here. the first is to zeeshan parwez and the program itself, but i'll save that for another post. the second goes out to Gumby and Omran.
its really difficult to truly see just how amazing these two have been for this show. for starters, they're not two-bit hotel lobby musicians, they're absolutely huge stars in their own right. and yet, not only are their egos safely parked elsewhere, they go out of their way to get the kids to relax, and with each of them, they've been brilliant in getting the best ouf of them. that's no mean feat when you consider the constraints of time and the innate pakistani penchant for marroing.
more importantly, they've led brilliantly with their instincts. other than usman riaz, where perhaps there was some overanalysing to blame, each of the songs have been produced but not overproduced. the collaborations are generally inspired - the biggest hit was the trumpet for Ramlal and the tabla for Athar Sani, but the decision to go rather bare with Reidi Gull was just as impressive. with each song, these guys were genuinely eager to get the best thing out there. and for that, a big sabz salam.
